Deconstructing an Elder’s Household

What to do with what can’t be downsizedAs parents and loved ones age, they may require more care that can be better provided by an assisted living or nursing home. If you’ve been on a waiting list, notification of an available space may involve a tight timeline that requires moving quickly. In this case deconstructing the elder’s previous residence usually falls to family members, who must then decide the fate of a lifetime’s worth of material goods. This can seem like an overwhelming task, but by breaking the project into a series of steps you can whittle it down to a manageable form. If you need help, you may want to hire a professional, such as Moving Matters. This is a company that specializes in “helping seniors make positive life transitions.”

Stop All Automatic Deliveries

Immediately call all companies that provide regular services to the elder’s former household. Newspaper delivery and magazine subscriptions should be redirected to the elder’s new residence, if desired, but cable, Internet and satellite subscriptions should be immediately canceled. If the elder owned the home, you may wish to keep electric and gas services to the residence until you decide what to do with it. Pay all final bills and keep a record of the date of cancellation of services.

Gather Important Documents

By the time most people reach an advanced age, they have accumulated a number of important documents about past events and current assets. These documents can be important for selling property or acquiring government benefits. Family members should immediately locate these documents, which may be held in the home or in a bank safe deposit box. One family member, preferably the one who has the power of attorney for the elder, should keep these items in a safe place so they can be produced when needed.

Remove Perishables

Take food items out of the refrigerator, freezer or pantry and use or discard as required. Be aware that some foods are likely to be past their expiration dates, including canned goods. If in doubt, throw it out. If you or other family members cannot use the items, bring them to a local food bank that accepts donations.

Make a List of Furniture Items

Consult the elder, if possible, as to where the more valuable pieces should go. Large furniture items, china and silverware that have been in the family for years may have significance for family members who will want them in their own homes. If there is any personal jewelry, the elder may have preferences as to who should receive them. If the elder is unable or unwilling to make these decisions, and they aren’t specific in a will, make a list of the items and send it to family members to see who is interested. This is where things often get tricky, so tread carefully to avoid arguments. Some families with more than one child will assign approximate monerary or emotional value to items and then take turns choosing. Call local charities to determine if they are willing to pick up unwanted items as a donation. If you wish to make arrangements with a consignment shop for some pieces, talk to several businesses and get their terms in writing before handing over the property.

Knick-Knacks

Most households accumulate hundreds of knick-knacks, or tchochkis, of little value other than a sentimental one. Some of these items may have special meaning to friends and family members. Cellphone cameras make it easy to take photos of these items to send to interested parties who live a distance away, to see if they want them as a memento. Put aside a particular day to have extended family members visit the home to take what they want as keepsakes. After the dispersals are made, you may want to collect the remainder in boxes and bring them to your local Goodwill, church mission or charity thrift shop.

Disposition of the Home

If a family member or the family as a whole is keeping the place of residence, you may be able to leave some furniture or other items in place. If the home is to be sold and the proceeds dispersed, the property must be cleaned and prepared for putting it on the real estate market. Minor repairs, painting or new carpeting may be required. A family member who has durable power of attorney for the elder should handle interactions with the real estate agent and potential purchasers of the property.

The disposition of an elder’s household can be an emotionally and physically draining endeavor. This organized approach to the task can help to reduce the stress and make it more manageable. If it feels overwhelming, it may make sense to hire additional help.